The Anxious Battle
There I sat on the kitchen floor, once again. Holding my chest due to the pain, unable to breathe, body starting to tingle, and feeling light headed. I have had these random episodes multiple times at this point.
Fear of something serious going wrong, I went to see my doctor. I explained these episodes to him and he started asking me what my personal life was like. 20 year old single mother of an almost 2 year old little girl at the time, working a full time AND part time job, while also trying to attend college full time. Living on my own in a little apartment in one of the worst towns I’ve ever lived in.
At that moment it was perfectly clear I was having severe panic attacks. Naturally, I was prescribed anxiety medication. Lorazepam to be exact. At first, I was pleasantly surprised how well these little pills worked for me! Two weeks in and I was constantly happy, smiling all the time, feeling like I was living my best life. Until I ran out and had to wait another three days for my appointment with my physician. I felt like my whole life plummeted into a dark abyss that I had no clue how I was going to crawl out of. Three days I spent hardly moving, hardly talking, and literally living on autopilot. After my refill I swore I could never go another day without this medication.
Two years down the road, I move towns. Working a better job, out of school, in a loving relationship…who needs those pills? Me… I still needed them! This beautiful life I was living, and I STILL NEEDED these pills!! At this point, I had realized what was truly the problem here, my body had become dependent on the chemical effect this had on my brain… i.e. I was addicted.
Around this time, CBD had really started to just come out, especially a lot of gummy edibles in smoke shops that you still see today. Regardless of the skeptikal nature that now surrounds most CBD products that do not contain lab testing, I hopped on the wagon. And realized the amazingly profound effect this product had on my life. Mind you, I had smoked marijuana for many years prior to this point but, it seemed to make my anxiety worse. So, I wanted to go a different direction. I am now 26 years old, with 2 beautiful children, a Holistic Medicine degree under my belt and an amazing new respect for Hemp. I am now an advocate for Hemp-based products - especially CBD, Natural medicine, and Energetic Healing. There is hope out there for so many men and women who are suffering with panic attacks, anxiety, depression or overall stress. These products truly do add to the quality of life I am so grateful to be living. Hopefully my story shows that you don’t have to fight this battle alone. There is hope to be found in a natural form.